Hello lovely readers,
Truth has been the struggle for me lately. I feel like I am constantly questioning my reality, the space I take up, and the person I am becoming, especially during this troubling social and political time. How can I be my best self/ best activist, while not completely burning out? How can I radiate love and kindness without giving out too much of myself, or being taken advantage of? What does balance look like in friendship, relationships, work, and family?
Tarot is my go-to grounding tool. Pulling cards for myself and my friends helps me confront the difficult, ugly, or perplexing experiences within my reality, check myself, and uncover some type of truth from them. I have been feeling very inspired lately to connect my love for tarot with the zodiac, as a way to connect with others. I am feeling inspired by Galactic Rabbit, Lana del Rey, Silvia Federici, all of the May rain storms, and a new tarot deck. I thank you for being here with me and I hope these notes inspire you as well.
About the read: 12 cards were drawn at random, and assigned to each zodiac sign in chronological order. You may choose to read for your sun, rising, or moon sign, depending on which sign is resonating most with you lately. This read was done using the gorgeous Fountain Tarot deck, which you can check out here.
Xo -chelsea coreen
Sometimes the emotional tension in a room is so thick you can feel it stick to your skin, sticky like sweat. Like a humid shadow. Last week, I sat down with two of my students, over what started out a group project tiff, later escalating into an adolescent crisis in their identity/friendship; they were both so angry with themselves and each other that they started crying. Do you ever feel so confused that you want to cry? We stop letting people see that part of us when we “grow up” and instead bottle that shit up in some deep place in the back of our minds. Internal struggle has been real for you lately, no thanks to this tumultuous societal climate, and it can sometimes feel like your identity is being pulled apart.
People are so scared of pulling The Devil card, mostly because we are scared of putting a face to our fears. What has you all shook up and anxious, lately, Aquarius? It’s okay to confront that figure hanging around in the dark corners of your conscience. And it doesn’t make you weak to do so. Give it a name. Say it out loud. You have all the light you need to come out of this a better version of yourself. You always have.
Pisces-Queen of Cups
Mirrors are fascinating as fuck; they are made of the same periodic elements as sand (SiO2), then lined with silver, and because of their shiny surfaces, reflect ourselves back at us instead of absorbing the light. When you boil love down to itself, it, like mirrors, is tricky chemistry (and biology, and physics). We absorb it and reflect it and rearrange our brain’s receptor cells to make room for more of it. Yes, babe, you can get addicted to love, in pretty much the same way you get addicted to anything else.
Queen of Cups asks us to do a different kind of reflecting: how is our love for others like a mirror? What would your love say if it could talk? What colors does it refract and absorb? Water can be a reflecting pool or an ocean. It can sustain ecosystems of life or ruthlessly destroy. You are waist-deep in love, Pisces, and in love with being in love. It’s a beautiful place to be, but that line between love and addiction is fragile and thin. Don’t wade out further than you can swim. Remember to save some of that good magic for you.
You have been on this quest for a while now, Aries. It’s been the kind of hero’s journey (and you, of course, the dapper, fly af hero) you read about in a storybook: mountain climbing, and fire-breathing dragon slaying, and haunted river crossing, and finally you have reached the mythical skycastle of your dreams. Waiting for you inside this castle, through trap doors, and candlelit hallways, and many, many moving staircases, is a box with your name on it. You have no idea what is inside and you are not sure you even want to know. It could be a million dollars, but it could also be a Portkey straight back into the dragon’s lair. You are tired, and sweaty, and in need of a mimosa and a deep tissue massage, and the last thing you feel like doing right now is embarking down another rabbithole. And isn’t the castle enough for now? No.
The Hierophant calls on us to seek knowledge and seek the truth, to open the box, always.
The Elephant Journal recently published an article about how being an empath, sensing and taking on the emotions of others, can lead to adrenal fatigue. And you, Taurus, are thinking, ummfuckingduh, because you are pretty much always fighting the good fight out here. You are no stranger to demon-wrestling, whether the demons look like a suit-dude-boss you hate, your never ending battle with the patriarchy, depression, or self-doubt. Or a combination!? Take a deep breath, boo. Is it trying you to be a warrior for the many, many people who you love? Are you remembering to be a warrior for yourself?
Strength card calls on us to be strong (again, FUCKINGDUH) but that doesn’t always have to feel like an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer; it can feel like forgiveness. It can feel like spending the day with your elixir of choice and a favorite TV show/pet/book, and saying allthatothershitcanwaittiltomorrow. And btw, by forgiveness I mostly mean forgiving yourself. Isn’t it freeing to admit that you will never be perfect?
Gemini-Ace of Cups
There’s a plant on my windowsill called oxalis triangularis (“The Love Plant”), which had an extremely rough winter. For a while, I thought it was dead, which, to add to the injury of a dying plant, seemed like a horrible extended metaphor for the state of my heart. Spring always seems to come around just when we feel so completely exhausted by winter that we can’t take it anymore. The cold, grey, tired energy of winter just never seems to go away. Until it does. One morning we wake up and it’s still cold, but the sun feels fuller, and there are tiny white flowers on the windowsill.
Ace of Cups says your winter is finally over (and it’s almost Gemini season <3 ). Now everything is winged, and wide-eyed, and green, including your heart, Gemini. Let it flood. Let it bloom.
Somewhere between birth and now, you learned to comb the wild from your hair. You taught yourself to swallow the feral howl in your throat, but you feel it lodged there, lately. You aren’t choking, but you aren’t breathing easy, either. Do you know what your heart’s song sounds like?
The Moon urges us to Let. It. Out. Embrace your strange soulsong. Listen to it. It’s rabid. It’s a symphony. It’s yours.
Leo-Knight of Swords
The New York City marathon stretches across all 5 boroughs, over bridges, up hills, through the parks, and ends in the middle of Manhattan, with live bands and banners, and blankets, and fanfare. It is said to be the most invigorating marathon to run, because every inch of the race is surrounded by cheering fans, in a way only New York City could, their energy contagious. Maybe you didn’t run a marathon, or even a 5k, but whatever you’re getting into lately sure has felt like it.
Knight of Swords confirms what you have always known about yourself: that you light up every room, Leo, whether you are at the center of attention or not. Remember this, as you expend your energy on others. It is an exhausting paradox to be the life of every party, the protagonist of every plot, the winner of every race. In a marathon, it was never really about who finishes first, but finishing at all. The fact that is you are there at all has always made you the winner.
Virgo-Five of Wands
You know the feeling when you wake up from a nightmare, and there’s that short span of time when your brain is trying to figure out if what you just dreamt was real or not? Okay, so maybe pretty much every day since November 9 we’ve been feeling like that, but you feel extra *~haunted~* lately, like some part of your energy is off and you can’t quite put your finger on it. Sometimes a bad dream really is just that, but sometimes it's symbolizing an important message from our subconscious.
Five of Wands is a sage-for-your-soul of sorts. It’s time to clear out the whateverthefuck has got you feeling all twisted, even if you’re not sure what that might be. For needed clarity, try switching up your daily routines and priorities. Take a mental health day, take a different route to work, give yourself a break from the Instagram rat race. Trust your intuition, always, Virgo. If a person/place/space feels suffocating to you for whatever reason, you’re probably right.
Libra-King of Coins
Gardening is not a hobby for the impatient (or for the germophobe). It can take weeks for small seeds to finally germinate, only when the water/soil/light conditions are just right. Plants have a special power called gravitropism that “tells them” to grow the right way, even if they are upside down, so no matter how they start off, they always grow upwards. You have been doing a lot of growth lately, Libra, both spiritually and in your personal goals. Doesn’t feel like it maybe, but remember that all growth starts somewhere small. When was the last time you drank water? When was the last time you thanked yourself for continuing to push upwards? Take time to look back at where you started, and appreciate how far you have come.
King of Coins calls on us to take notice of our roots, where they have settled, and feel how deeply we are grounded right now. Dig your feet into the soil. Feel the mud between your toes. You are exactly where you need to be.
Scorpio-Knight of Wands
We are often taught by the world to take up less space, to smile and be patient, to be quiet and thoughtful. These are not inherently bad qualities, as long as we reflect on the reasons we are choosing to be quiet, thoughtful, and small. Is it because it is best for ourselves and our souls, or because it makes our presence easier on someone else? At an assembly this past fall with the Harlem Globetrotters, the team called for volunteer students to come to the stage for a “dance off” and chance to win season tickets to their games. One of my students, a nervous little boy, who has been the victim of horrible bullying, cautiously raised his hand and was called on stage. I held my breath, worried he might trip, or get stage fright, or do something that might make the other children tease him even more. When the music started though, he danced like a shooting star, pirouetting, twisting, and booty shaking to the Drake beat. The audience was stunned, and although some laughed, most kids cheered him on. His pure joy and energy was the highlight of the show.
The cliche goes “dance like noone is watching” but Knight of Wands says to dance like everyone is watching because they are, because they should be. You are the reason for the big lights tonight, Scorpio. Whatever you are trying to achieve right now, let it be the headlining act.
In a ritual adapted from Danielle Ayoka, I like make a list of all of the things that have been bogging me down in the moon cycle, and set it on fire the night of the Full Moon. The first time I watched my list crumble into ash, on the eve of my 25th birthday, I felt a wave of euphoria rush through my body, almost like I just did a bump of cocaine. I was so elated...and then immediately passed out. The alchemy of intention is so real, and oh fuck, did I have a lot to let go of.
Sometimes our life’s chaos is a beautiful static, and full of possibility, but The Tower says to call bullshit for what it is. Are your glasses too rosy lately? Are you holding on to a toxic ex, job that makes your heart hurt, trajectory that is not actually what you want for yourself? Let go let go LET THE FUCK GO. And let it go with love and well wishes. Yes this is another one of those SCARY cards, but what’s scarier is what can happen to us when we are too afraid to admit that our shit has indeed hit the fan. Strike a match. Watch it burn.
Capricorn-Two of Swords
There, again, the midnight thunderstorm. Your soul has insomnia. You don’t sleep much ever, but especially not lately. Your neurons are so busy. Calendar dates fall from your ceiling like rain. You are no stranger to the hustle, the twoaday, the early morning deepsea dive. Crusader for yourself and your heart, always. Your sword makes you a boss, bossbabe. You have always been the thing to be feared.
Two of Swords is a choice, though. Your hands are literally full right now, and although you are used to juggling the tough shit, it’s time to make a decision, Capricorn. No, you cannot choose both options. Yes, the choice you make will be right.